Raising Daughters with Healthy Body Image

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I have the privilege and joy of raising three daughters (currently 8,6 and 4) who I have no doubt will change the world with their bravery, spunk, passion, intelligence and kindness. However, I’d be a fool not to recognize the pressures society puts on girls these days. Especially when it comes to body image.

The truth is, we live in a day when success is in part defined by how you look.   Don’t believe me?  Just go to the magazine aisle of your local grocery store or retailer and you’ll see rows and rows of magazine devoted to the lives of beautiful people.  And not just an everyday kind of beautiful but an unattainable/photoshopped kind of beautiful.  

So as a mom of three girls, I’m left wondering how can my 8 year old, who recently drew this self portrait of herself, go from viewing herself as a princess to viewing herself as anything but a princess in a few short years?  

While I’m admittedly still in the trenches of raising my girls and have very little wisdom to share when it comes to shaping girls who grow up to be women who have a healthy body image, I’m lucky enough to have sat under the mentorship of some phenomenal women who have raised girls (now women) well. I’m also fortunate to have grown up in a home with parents who raised me to have a healthy body image.  

5 Tips for Raising Daughters with a Healthy Body Image

The following suggestions are ones shared with me when asked how to raise daughters with a healthy body image.

  1. Identify if you have body image issues yourself. Address them or they will bleed into how your daughter sees herself.  For example: Don’t make constant reference to your “fat thighs,” freak out if you miss a workout or chastise yourself for eating ice cream!
  2. Delight in your children.  Throughout their childhood, delight in your daughter’s uniquenesses.  Work to identify something in each of your children that they excel in.  By delighting and celebrating the uniqueness in each of your children, they will feel supported by you, it will help eliminate competition and it will give them self confidence, so they search less for finding self confidence in their appearance.
  3. Be careful to not compare. Do not compare them with their other siblings, friends or anyone else.  Encourage them to please themselves when it comes to what they look like rather than please others.  This empowers them when it comes to the pressures others could put on them.  
  4. Help them to be “other” centered. Is there someone at lunch or on the bus that sits alone?  Help teach your children to notice others who might feel alone or in need of a friend. Getting your children to look outside of themselves inspires them to do more and gives them personal confidence.  
  5. Educate your children about food, nutrition, exercise. Do so without being obsessive and watching every bit they eat.  Talk with them while you grocery shop and let them help pick out healthy foods.  All the while keeps everything in moderation.

However, I’d be a fool to not recognize the pressures society puts on girls these days. There’s a constant underlying message that to be successful, you must be beautiful.

A special thank you to Diane, Darcy, Julie and my own mom, Michelle, for the wisdom they’ve passed down to me over the years when it comes to raising girls with a healthy body image.  

What are some tips that YOU have learned for instilling a healthy body image in your daughters (OR your sons)?

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About {Steph}

Steph Flies. Steph is the Founder & Director of City Moms Blog Network; growing the network after founding its original site, Scottsdale Moms Blog, in 2009. Now living in the greater Minneapolis area, she oversees the national network by spearheading growth strategies, sales initiatives and shepherding and encouraging an ever-increasing number of moms managing individual local parenting websites. She is married to Alan and is mom to three little girls, Nora, Elsie and Audrey. She loves throwing a great party, connecting people and cooking with a glass of red wine in hand.