To My Son’s Birth Mother

We had to write a letter to you for our adoption profile. At the time, you were just an idea. We hadn’t seen or met you or your baby yet. We didn’t even know if he was growing in your belly or if that was years away. We tried to come up with the words to write to this stranger who was giving us an amazing gift. What do you say to someone you’ve never met but is giving you love and life?

It was hard to form those words, but we managed to piece together a letter that came from the heart. Simple phrases like “thank you” and “we’re praying for you” filled the page. Then we waited. Nine months later you gave us an incredible gift. You chose me to be the mother to your son. You read my words and looked at the pictures of my family and said yes.

You changed my life forever. You gave me another son. You filled a space in my heart that had been empty for years. You trusted my husband and I to raise your son. You trusted my little boy to be the big brother your son deserved. You trusted the words we wrote in our profile. We promised to tell our son about you. We hoped that you would want to be involved in his life too. We promised to love him and raise him in a happy home.

What do you say to someone you’ve never met but is giving you love and life?

It’s been a month. I had no idea what adoption would look like. We’re all a little exhausted and overwhelmed. I’ve changed formula three times, searched for breast milk donors, taken your little boy to urgent care…yet all these sleepless nights and changes in routine are worth it to me when I look at him.  I wonder if he has your eyes or his father’s. And I wonder if, right now, the decision you made for adoption is something you still feel was the right thing to do.

I didn’t know that your son would so easily fit in our family. That he would capture our hearts so quickly. I had high hopes, but I didn’t know for sure.

I haven’t met you, but I can already tell you are someone amazing. You carried this tiny little boy for nine months. You gave birth and nursed him in the hospital. You held him in your arms and made the hard choice to say goodbye, going home empty handed. You trusted a family of strangers to love your little boy.

We can’t wait to meet you. I look forward to the day that you reach out to us, ready to see him again. Ready to meet us. I don’t judge you for your choice. I celebrate you! I pray for you each night and thank God for creating you. You picked us. You gave us the most amazing gift. Something more incredible than we ever imagined.